The long journey to you

Over 12 hours of road travel,
to come to you,

Because you fell sick suddenly,

and nobody knew.

Just the day before, I had spoken to you.
Making those fake promises to come meet you.
Which I always extended.
Studies, college, no time
And I really didn't get time to say goodbye.

48 hours since I got the news,

I kept praying to keep you alive.
In that journey to you, I kept praying too. 
Not once did it cross that you'd be gone. 
Repeated phone calls to get there sooner didn't tick me off too.

12 hours of road travel; of heat, nausea, dizziness, exhaustion.
When we entered the familiar territory, 
Somehow goosebumps started showing on my skin, 
I saw my mum silently weeping, 
I saw my sister staring blankly ahead.
And I lost all emotions.

We reached. 
I got off and ran barefoot

I saw my youngest uncle.

Suddenly so old, he hugged me very hard and let go.
I ran and met my other uncle,

who with a sad smile, let me go ahead. 
The whole gaon had converged to our house. 
I searched for my father's face for comfort 
And got only pitiful stares from strangers.

I stepped in,

And saw you on the floor.

The earth stopped rotating,

the force made me crash on the floor.

Strapped with flowers, cold since 12 hours.

I didn't receive my warm hug that day from you. 
You didn't even wait for me to say bye.
I didn't even cry as I kissed you goodbye.

Our last conversation will be the one where I lied to come see you soon. 

Little did I know you'd be gone forever.
Little did I know I'll be crying ever after.

This too shall pass

Do you remember that time,
when you wanted to chuck everything and run away?
The problem seemed so huge,
you felt your shoulders would give away.

That sickening feeling in your tummy,
the hair standing on your nape,
your hands getting clammy,
your thoughts all murky?

The moment,
before stepping in for your first interview,
before entering the gym the first time,
before jumping in the pool without the float

"All eyes on me"
"What if I screw this?"
"What if they laugh at me?"
"What if drown?"

"Wait... What's the worse that could happen to me?"
And you dive.

As you hit the water head on,
the splash breaks your fear in a million pieces,
with every push and stroke,
you reach closer to the goal.
Nothing can stop you now!

As you step out of the interview
head held high;
After a gruelling gym session
with feel-good body ache,
turning around and
seeing the length you've swum,
It was all worth it.

Like then,
Like everytime,

This too shall pass.
You shall conquer it all.

Heartbreak

The thing about love
is that noone told you about it's end
Books and films a full,
of love blossoming
Hardly you find a one,
about the end.

You don't just cry,
you lament,
at the times gone by,
you bawl,
at injustice to your heart
you whimper,
of being alone.
Because love has died, and with it
a part of you.

Days go by.
To hide your mourning,
you act
as your world hasn't tumbled on it's axis.
You work listlessly,
a spectre wandering about
instead of you.
And at night, you replay the moment again and again
"What went wrong?"
Until your eyes give in.

Months later, or years later,
you are a new person,
cursing that heartbreaker
to never be loved again,
whilst protecting yourself
from potential heartbreakers
But lovers alike.

Maybe you'll get over,
maybe you'll never.
It's just a rite of time.
Which I couldn't promise ends.